My response to "Your children want YOU"
Since when did we start hiring stylists for family birthday parties? or friends baby showers? Since when did we feel the need to post pictures of every single detail of what we did for our child's birthday party all over Facebook but not mention the real TRUTH of the party... as in how you fought with your husband earlier in the day, or the way your child actually didn't even want to eat the dinosaur shaped food you spent hours making.
I finished reading the article ""Your Children Want YOU" written by April Perry yesterday and it had me all fired up! For awhile now I have felt this very thing but never articulated it. I have been finding myself more and more turned off by all the "perfect people" in my life... or maybe I should clarify, "my online life"! ha. So many people now have their expensive DSLR cameras and take these amazing pictures of what looks like their perfect life.
At first it was exciting to sees how great of photos one can take, but now I find myself so turned off by all the perfection that I actually gravitate and LOVE my friends photos that are taken with crappy digital cameras and show random real shots of their child often out of focus! Does this make sense? It's not like there is really anything wrong with taking excellent photos, it's just that it all becomes the SAME after awhile.... every family portrait..... every shot of babe and mom....every perfect image.
Back to my point. The article. Okay, the author talks a lot about Pinterest and how it is fuelling this desire for perfection. And at the same time taking us away from what really matters. Although it is great to get fun ideas off of Pinterest to do with your child, the point is your child really just wants time and love from you. TIME. and perhaps a relaxed and happy mom. Not a mom that is desperately trying to do this amazing craft project, all the while photographing it for their blog.
And I am guilty of all of this. Trust me.
I actually "applied" for my Pinterest account and got my "invitation" only to not use it (such a joke that they make you apply, as if it is some club you may or may not get in to). It's still sitting in my inbox and I haven't yet decided what to do with it. I feel like I already spend too much time online, yet when I have browsed Pinterest I have found such fun ideas.... like teaching your child the cycle of the moon with oreo cookies. Come on, that's awesome! And I would never have thought of that on my own. What to do, what to do.
Do I have the personal strength to view all these images and not beat myself up for not having a clean home? For not having the physical strength to get extravagant birthday parties together because I live with chronic pain?
We'll see.
For now, if you are a mom and any of this rings true to you, go read the article and take a moment to remember that your children really just want you.
I believe in what St. Irenaeus says, "The glory of God is a human being fully alive." The greatest gift we can give God is ourselves fully alive. Therefore, I believe this is also the greatest gift we can give our children.
Let us live our lives ALIVE and WELL.
xo
I finished reading the article ""Your Children Want YOU" written by April Perry yesterday and it had me all fired up! For awhile now I have felt this very thing but never articulated it. I have been finding myself more and more turned off by all the "perfect people" in my life... or maybe I should clarify, "my online life"! ha. So many people now have their expensive DSLR cameras and take these amazing pictures of what looks like their perfect life.
At first it was exciting to sees how great of photos one can take, but now I find myself so turned off by all the perfection that I actually gravitate and LOVE my friends photos that are taken with crappy digital cameras and show random real shots of their child often out of focus! Does this make sense? It's not like there is really anything wrong with taking excellent photos, it's just that it all becomes the SAME after awhile.... every family portrait..... every shot of babe and mom....every perfect image.
Back to my point. The article. Okay, the author talks a lot about Pinterest and how it is fuelling this desire for perfection. And at the same time taking us away from what really matters. Although it is great to get fun ideas off of Pinterest to do with your child, the point is your child really just wants time and love from you. TIME. and perhaps a relaxed and happy mom. Not a mom that is desperately trying to do this amazing craft project, all the while photographing it for their blog.
And I am guilty of all of this. Trust me.
I actually "applied" for my Pinterest account and got my "invitation" only to not use it (such a joke that they make you apply, as if it is some club you may or may not get in to). It's still sitting in my inbox and I haven't yet decided what to do with it. I feel like I already spend too much time online, yet when I have browsed Pinterest I have found such fun ideas.... like teaching your child the cycle of the moon with oreo cookies. Come on, that's awesome! And I would never have thought of that on my own. What to do, what to do.
Do I have the personal strength to view all these images and not beat myself up for not having a clean home? For not having the physical strength to get extravagant birthday parties together because I live with chronic pain?
We'll see.
For now, if you are a mom and any of this rings true to you, go read the article and take a moment to remember that your children really just want you.
I believe in what St. Irenaeus says, "The glory of God is a human being fully alive." The greatest gift we can give God is ourselves fully alive. Therefore, I believe this is also the greatest gift we can give our children.
Let us live our lives ALIVE and WELL.
xo
posted by emily at
8:53 AM
4 Comments:
this is the best post you've written in a long time! I LOVED this! that article is amazing, and I really appreciate your thoughts, and that beautiful quote at the end; so inspiring.
love you!
Totally %100 agree with every word! It takes enough energy and attention as it is to truely give your child YOU, to throw in all that other stuff is exhausting and overwhelming for me. We need to give ourselves this break as mothers, and support each other in being fully alive as mommas together!
I admit I have tried 3 pinterest recipes and 2 crafts with my Kindergarten students, and mine did not turn out anything like the perfection in the photos! Nick keeps asking for an at home party this year and all I can think of is how I'll have to clean so much before the kids come and so much after...I'd rather have it elsewhere..is that bad?? Lol!!!
Claire
Good post, Em! I agree wholeheartedly. I find FB often makes me feel like an inadequate mother because I'm not doing outrageous, crafty projects with my kids, my house isn't decorated to the nines, and *gasp* I let my kids watch TV. It's so easy to beat yourself up about it. I just read this article that you might enjoy:
http://www.imperfecthomemaking.com/2012/04/things-good-moms-do-my-thoughts-on.html
Another pet peeve; when other moms (young or old) tell you how you parent is wrong, or what you're doing is wrong or you "should" be doing something or another differently. Why can't we be more supportive of one another instead of judgemental. The online world is so bad for that ...
OK, rant over.
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