tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74596463163072014132024-03-13T08:47:00.978-07:00My narrative.I started this blog as a way to chronicle our journey to adopting our son from Ethiopia. Now it is a place for me to write, vent, and tell my story as a mom to two kids. I would have created a new blog but I was too lazy and I will always heart Ethiopia.emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.comBlogger184125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-20449578348647714592016-10-14T13:49:00.001-07:002016-10-14T13:49:29.455-07:00Home!So sorry for not updating sooner. I've done the classic adoption blogger move and not updated upon arriving home. Life of course has been a whole lot busier lately!<br />
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-lW0Q1QhO73c/WAFDmtKs4nI/AAAAAAAABNE/1LTxz65jzCQ0Htuw1sFymPvExHtd8ZCPACK4B/s1600/20.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img border="0" height="425" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-lW0Q1QhO73c/WAFDmtKs4nI/AAAAAAAABNE/1LTxz65jzCQ0Htuw1sFymPvExHtd8ZCPACK4B/s640/20.jpg" width="640" /></a><br />
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Here's a picture of our beautiful boy celebrating his 1st birthday at home in Canada! We were so fortunate to have him home for this big day and to celebrate just the other week when he took his first steps. <br />
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And here is one of our first family photos of us as a family of FIVE. This was taken at our favourite French cafe we visited often in Lesotho (hello good coffee and crepes!). We ended up staying at Lancer's Inn right in the middle of city centre which we loved. It reminded me a lot of Addis Ababa. There were a couple restaurants in the same complex that we could walk to or pick up food from and bring back to our rooms. I would highly recommend this place for families that will travel in the future. We traveled in the winter and it got to be -3 at night and very very cold. Buildings aren't insulated like they are here in Canada so you really feel the cold there. We tried to stay at another place in a more remote location but just couldn't tough it out! Way too cold for me! <br />
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I will try to post more later but I just wanted to give a quick update. Solomon has fit right into our family and we are all adjusting well. The trip was challenging but good. Flying that long (30 hours) with young kids is something I don't think I ever want to do again!!! Of course it was all worth the stress in the end. Our kids have embraced their little brother and our family finally feels complete. <br />
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<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-90170477551238833962016-06-24T10:13:00.000-07:002016-06-24T10:13:15.437-07:00Travel is booked!I have been so busy the past few weeks I have had no time to update this blog and say that we are now ready to travel. We got the call that all of our boys paperwork is in. He is legally our son and we can't wait to go and meet him. <br />
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We leave this coming week and will be gone for 3 weeks. I'm excited to have him in my arms but am dreading the long flight with our two kids to get there! Please pray it all goes smoothly. There has been a lot of stress lately due to the fact that I wasn't aware South Africa has a new law that requires extra paperwork to get in and out of the country for all minors. Mostly it is simple (long form birth certificates for your children that show their parents names on it) but if you are an adopted child it gets more complicated. It honestly makes me mad since my son is a Canadian citizen and he shouldn't have to bring court documents from years ago but I believe this law is in an effort to stop child trafficking. Anyways, please pray that our documents are suffice (we do not have the original court doc that they want, only a copy) and that we are not help up anywhere. My stomach is in knots over this! Also, pray that Solomon's Canadian passport comes in time for our flights out! <br />
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I can't wait to post a picture of us together as a family of FIVE for the first time!<br />
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thanks for following along.<br />
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xoemilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-15352080760094567392016-04-29T13:06:00.003-07:002016-04-29T13:09:38.123-07:00We got THE CALL!I still can't believe it happened. Last week I got the call from our agency that we were matched. I was in shock because it is April and I knew there were no matching meetings happening. I kept saying this can't be real, it's April! But they assured me it was. I literally was shaking!<br />
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Turns out those rainbows I saw on the day of the last matching meeting in March really were a sign after all!!! I remember how strongly I felt that that was our meeting. Well, it turns out our little boy was matched to another family at that meeting. The details and pictures never did make it to them because when the agency called them to let them know they were matched they had to decline due to some personal circumstances. I don't know anything more but our agency then told Lesotho that the family was no longer able to move forward and then they went back to the table and chose us!<br />
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<i>"I am choosing to believe that the rainbow I saw that night was meant to encourage me to keep waiting a little bit longer." </i><br />
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Our little boy will be named Solomon. He is only 8 months old right now! We hope to travel and bring him home in 4-6 months.<br />
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The kids are thrilled and can't wait to welcome him into the family.<br />
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I'll post more later and perhaps his photo once I know we have passed court and he is officially "ours".<br />
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<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-5487895713497647562016-03-13T21:36:00.001-07:002016-03-13T21:39:27.618-07:00rainbows and hopeOn Thursday we had one of the craziest days of weather we have had in a long time. The entire day was on and off hail and rain and wind up to 80 kilometres an hour. The storm had finally passed and it was time for me to drive my son to gymnastics in the town next to us. As I drove there I realized I was driving back into the storm. I dropped him off with more hail and thunder and went about my errands in town. When I went to pick him up the sun was starting to shine and one of the most beautiful rainbows was in the sky. It was amazing. A complete full rainbow.... as I pulled back up to his gymnastics I realized that there was now a double rainbow. I stopped the car and decided to take a picture so I could show him when he got out. I felt such a sense of peace when I saw this rainbow, as if it was God saying to me that my kids really are coming. When I saw the double rainbow I immediately thought "it's the twins!" For so long now I have dreamed of these twins that I have seen at Beautiful Gate. Anyways, it is fun to believe in signs so I decided to enjoy it for what it is worth. After I took the photo I checked my messages and saw that someone else whose dossier is in country had talked to our agency that day and heard there was a surprise matching meeting last week and they had just received the results. An email was to be coming out shortly after the lucky families were called. <br />
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That's when I started to really freak out. Like THIS IS IT freaking out. I even called my husband and told him to get ready because I really believed we could be getting the call the next day about a referral. <br />
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Part of me worried the phone call would have already happened that day and that maybe they stay at work late for this sort of thing or call people at home in the evenings so therefore it <i>wasn't</i> us. There was no message on my home phone when I got home that night. But I decided it was still possible so I went to bed with hope. Lots and lots of hope.<br />
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The next morning I was getting the kids ready for school and made sure my cell was turned on. As we were getting our backpacks and literally just about out the door my cell rang. My entire body literally shook. My heart was pounding. No one ever calls my cell at 8 in the morning.<br />
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And it was just an electrical wholesaler for work. Ahhh!!! So frustrating. I tried to calm down. When I came home I literally started nesting almost immediately. Cleaning, organizing, and checking emails. Okay, who am I kidding. I was mostly checking my emails. By lunch my hope was fading. I knew it wasn't us. They would've called right away in the morning. Disappointment again.<br />
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I sware the process for Ethiopia was much easier! Knowing when matching meetings occur and the fact that matches are made so subjectively makes this so difficult.<br />
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Anyways, as you can already tell we received an email that afternoon from our agency saying sorry but we were not matched. There was one match for Canada, two for Sweden and one for the US. Overall this is actually pretty good news. Four matches is better than it has been in the last year. Our agency also informed us that Lesotho has now agreed to have one social worker focus completely on trying to gather and complete paperwork for children that are adoptable. This is great news. <br />
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<a href="https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTX2UEOQYQtqwCbYk5ofrLh8cwjHjnG8kSE237AhLCc7aJcbKf5mQ" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Image result for quote on rainbows" border="0" class="rg_i" data-src="https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTX2UEOQYQtqwCbYk5ofrLh8cwjHjnG8kSE237AhLCc7aJcbKf5mQ" data-sz="f" jsaction="load:str.tbn" name="j2KZdw83fANkIM:" src="https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTX2UEOQYQtqwCbYk5ofrLh8cwjHjnG8kSE237AhLCc7aJcbKf5mQ" style="margin-top: -6px;" /></a>I'm trying to cling to hope. I'm trying to cling to the double rainbows that I saw and the fact that they spoke to me about our adoption even before I knew that there had literally just been a meeting. Maybe that in itself should comfort me now. Part of me laughs at how I look for signs in everything. Like this is something that I should've given up in high school. <br />
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But another part of me feels like it is actually a wonderful way to live. Rainbows have always been seen as a symbol of God's promise to us that he will never forsake us. I believe this is true. I am choosing to believe that the rainbow I saw that night was meant to encourage me to keep waiting a little bit longer. <br />
<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-59398181101840998452016-02-09T11:56:00.001-08:002016-02-09T11:56:09.755-08:00The wait continuesWell we are still here waiting. Lately all I can think of is adoption. I went from doing quite well with the wait the first year, to not so well. It'll be two years this May that our dossier will have been in Lesotho. I'm honestly getting worried about the program. I think that if more matches were happening even if they weren't for us, I would feel better. But the fact that so few are being matched (two last year) makes me think that it will never happen and that Lesotho will shut down.<br />
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Someone I know just returned from Lesotho. They brought their kids back to see the country where they were born. She told me not to give up because there were SO many kids that they saw in orphanages. Currently Beautiful Gate is maxed out at 72. But sadly I doubt many of these kids are deemed "adoptable" by the government. And the one's that are..... I am losing hope that anyone will do the work it takes to get the paperwork. The only reason our agency is giving us for the longer wait is missing paperwork. It's not that there aren't kids who need homes.<br />
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As you might notice I'm sounding rather negative about it all. Just being honest.<br />
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I feel like I need to know soon if Lesotho is going to work out or not. The next matching meeting is supposed to be in March but I haven't heard a confirmed date yet. <br />
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I know I have readers from Sweden and the Netherlands.... I would love to hear from you if you have anything to add to this. What are your agencies telling you? emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-67370544878109925452015-12-17T13:45:00.001-08:002015-12-17T13:45:51.148-08:00Our Christmas TreeWe weren't matched. Once again disappointment. Advent is the season of waiting and so we continue to wait. Only one family was matched from Canada this time and one from Lesotho. Things are continuing to move just as slow as ever.<br />
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I must admit that I have had something distracting me lately from obsessing over when this adoption will ever take place. We are also awaiting news from a searcher we have hired in Addis Ababa to find our son's birth mom. I can not promise you that if and when we hear news or find her that I will be able to share everything here because that is not my story to tell. But I will be able to tell you if we can find her and make contact. So far the search has been much more complicated than any of us could ever of imagined. All I can think about lately is where is she? How is she? Does she know that Moses is loved and doing well? <br />
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The other week we went and cut down our Christmas tree. When we brought it home my husband noticed this one branch that seemed more like a new tree growing off of the main one. He called it a nurse tree. I don't think this is an actual nurse tree as per the actual definition but as soon as he said it I thought to myself this branch symbolizes how Moses' birth mom is a part of our family. She is here in everything. In our son's smile, in our hearts, in our Christmas. We would not be this family without her. I continued decorating the tree with the kids and found our one special ornament I had bought from Ethiopia. It is made of wood and quite heavy and so I began to look for a strong branch and quickly remembered "the nurse tree". It was the perfect spot. Everytime I look at it my heart thinks of her. <br />
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<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-31597039109529074042015-12-02T11:01:00.001-08:002015-12-02T11:01:23.449-08:00UpdateWow, I had no idea it had been THIS long since I last updated here. As you might of guessed, we are still waiting. The last meeting was a few months ago and we were not matched. Adoptions in Lesotho have really slowed down. In fact, our agency in Canada has only had 2 completed Lesotho adoptions in 2015. We really hope things pick up in 2016 and more children can come into families. The reason for the slowdown is apparently issues in collecting paperwork. Children are really not adoptable without paperwork so it is so important for the social workers to be diligent. Our agency can only do so much. And of course many of us waiting families wonder if perhaps Lesotho just does not want to process more than a few adoptions each year.<br />
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Either way, we are still in it for the long haul. Every time I see my 7 year old son interact with a toddler my heart is full. I love seeing the nurturing side of my kids come out. A side I rarely see in the way they interact with each other! So it is nice to see when they are with their younger cousins. I can't wait to see them welcome a new sibling(s) into our family.<br />
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Next meeting is in two days. I promise to update sooner this time!emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-9370512346506728102015-07-21T12:56:00.000-07:002015-07-21T12:56:03.595-07:00The End of Ethiopian Adoptions: How it HappenedA friend of mine from the adoption world wrote this extremely well written article on Ethiopian adoptions. Please give it a read if this is something that interests you.<br />
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<a href="http://rowanfamilytree.com/2015/06/22/the-end-of-ethiopian-adoption-how-it-happened/">The End of Ethiopian Adoptions: How it happened</a><br />
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Lately it feels like the fate of all international adoptions is very bleak. Just today another agency in Canada has closed their doors to all international adoptions. If only a few are completed each year, it just doesn't seem like an adoption agency can afford to keep their doors open anymore. <br />
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Lesotho news? Well, we weren't matched at the last meeting in June but we're not giving up hope yet! There are so many genuine orphans in Lesotho that need homes and we are waiting and waiting to be a child's family! We've officially had our file in country for one year. I'm hopeful this next year will be it.<br />
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<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-82264248001349147272015-03-28T14:42:00.003-07:002015-03-30T11:10:51.401-07:00still waiting... I was trying hard to not think about the upcoming matching meeting at the end of this month. <br />
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I tried really hard.<br />
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but then I saw this viral video<br />
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and then I went to see this movie<br />
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and then Beautiful Gate in Lesotho posts pictures like this...<br />
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and my heart just kept thinking about the little person/people out there waiting for a family...<br />
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But then we got the surprising email from our agency just this week that the meeting was called on short notice earlier in the month and we were not matched. Sigh.... it was quite shocking but in a way it is better than dragging out waiting for the results and feeling like this could be it for the next two weeks. So now we wait again. <br />
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Till the next meeting 3 months from now... <br />
<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-86372613268566245292015-01-25T13:26:00.004-08:002015-01-25T13:26:52.837-08:00No matchWell, we finally got word that we were not matched on the December 12th meeting. It was a lot of weeks of waiting and thinking and I even started what felt like nesting at one point!<br />
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At first the meeting was scheduled for December 5th. The night before a matching meeting has you checking what the current time in Lesotho is and basically falling asleep praying for the meeting as you know it will be happening sometime while you sleep! Then come the days of waiting to hear the news.<br />
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But unfortunately we got the email that the meeting didn't happen at all because of paperwork! I pretty much expect stuff like this to happen but it is still disappointing every time. <br />
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After that, we have received word that things in the passport office (where they also print out birth certificates) were moving again and the meeting was to be held on the 12th. Well, only one match was made out of all four countries/four agencies, and that match went to someone from our agency. I believe it was for a single child. <br />
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So there you have it! If adoptions continue to move at this slow of a rate (one match per meeting) it will be years before we bring home another child!!!<br />
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The next meeting is scheduled for the end of March......<br />
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So thankful for a trip to Hawaii to celebrate our 10 year anniversary after Christmas! </div>
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<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-46613171819639192332014-11-05T12:56:00.001-08:002014-11-05T12:56:12.852-08:00update!Wow, this is a very overdue update. As you probably guessed we were not matched at the last matching meeting that <i>was</i> held during all the political unrest. Surprisingly, no Canadian families were matched that time. I'm not sure if this has happened before but only families from the other three countries were chosen. We just received news last week that another matching meeting has been set!<br />
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November 28th! So, we have a new date in our hearts and minds. New hope. <br />
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On my birthday a couple weeks ago I woke up and turned my computer on and saw an update on the Beautiful Gate Facebook page welcoming one month old boy girl twins! My heart literally leaped. I immediately asked God, "Is this my birthday gift from you? Seeing a picture of my future son and daughter?!" <br />
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I'm only writing this down on here in some bizarre for me act of faith in the hopes that if it is to be true I will be able to go back and read this blog entry and remember!!! <br />
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Oh those babies were so precious sleeping side by side in their cribs…<br />
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In reality, I don't even know if those two are adoptable. And if they are, Lesotho has a 5 month policy where the orphanage must search for birth family and make sure no one else from their family could come forward and raise them. I think this policy is actually quite amazing and even though it means we wouldn't be matched for a long time I am somehow okay with it all. <br />
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Okay, back to reality. I promise to update again soon!<br />
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<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-86548817038721921552014-09-01T18:27:00.003-07:002014-09-01T18:27:58.265-07:00Political UnrestSo our stable and peaceful country in Africa has now been in the news…. a lot...over the weekend. It doesn't sound good. If you haven't heard you can read this article <a href="http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2014-08-31/lesotho-should-decide-on-future-post-coup-s-africa-s-zuma-says.html">Lesotho in Limbo</a>.<br />
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One of the orphanages that I am "friends" with on Facebook has been giving updates on the political unrest as well and it has all of us waiting parents very worried. Anyone in the adoption world knows that when a Prime Minister flees to South Africa because of a coup that this could also mean the entire adoption program at best could be put on hold, or at worst be stopped altogether.<br />
I am really trying hard to hope that South Africa can intervene and help solve this crisis as soon as possible. I can't imagine how scary it would be to be a police officer in Maseru right now. People are literally breaking into their homes and stealing their uniforms and weapons. <br />
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All of this has also happened just after we received word from our agency that the matching meeting (long overdue) was going to be held on Friday the 29th. Well, it appears the coup started that night…. so I'm not sure if the government workers even met that day. <br />
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Hopefully I will have an update soon. I had felt so positive on Friday but now I'm not feeling so good.<br />
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<img alt="" src="http://static2.stuff.co.nz/1409613672/405/10450405.jpg" />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-44122637523713760982014-07-23T21:25:00.000-07:002014-07-23T21:25:04.708-07:00quick update! If anyone was waiting to hear…. no we were not matched at the last meeting. Turns out there never was a meeting!!! In typical African fashion it was post-poned until the end of August.<br />
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That's okay…. summer is flying by and I'm at peace with the wait so far.<br />
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<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-87043311145349852652014-06-27T14:47:00.001-07:002014-08-11T14:35:51.848-07:00Matching MeetingsWell, it's been a month since my last post and not much has gone on other than waiting. This is basically what we will be doing for the next few years I'm sure. Hm…. this blog is probably going to really get boring! In an effort to post something I thought I would write a bit today on how the referral process works in Lesotho. <br />
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In Lesotho they run things differently than Ethiopia and other countries and they have what are called "matching meetings" every 3-4 months. Each agency that they work with will have a certain number of files (dossiers) in the country and the social workers in Lesotho will look them over and find a family that they see as the best match for the children that are available for adoption. Instead of just going based on a numeric list of whose dossier got to the country first and then matching them to the next available child, Lesotho seems to take a much more subjective approach. Or at least this is my understanding of the process! In some ways, I like this process more than the way things were done in Ethiopia. Lesotho completes very few adoptions and things seem to be much more controlled, monitored, and in the end ethical. I also love that there are family reunifications that take place and are even celebrated from the orphanage that our agency works with. There was also one local adoption that was completed this past year (a Basotho couple adopting from within Lesotho). <br />
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Just after I wrote my last post I received an email from our agency saying sorry but you were not matched at the meeting that was held this week. Of course, our file had just arrived and I would not expect it to have even been read over let alone matched! But it does feel crazy to know it is in the hands of their social workers now. I received an email this week saying that the next matching meeting will hopefully be today. Crazy! I highly doubt we will be matched but part of me thinks that if there is a child with the exact medical needs and age range that we said we want to adopt then maybe we could be getting a phone call!!! Oh man, this is going to be a long few years...emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-44645209554873558742014-05-24T10:04:00.001-07:002014-05-24T10:06:55.641-07:00Officially paper pregnant!!!Who knew you could be so excited to officially wait!<br />
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On May 22nd I got the email from our agency that our dossier had landed in Maseru, Lesotho. It feels so crazy to know that a file with our pictures, our medical, our entire life story and essentially every detail about our lives is sitting somewhere in Lesotho right now!!!<br />
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What does this mean?<br />
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Well, our file will now be shown at the matching meetings that are held every 3-4 months. Lesotho works differently than Ethiopia and doesn't exactly follow a list. In Ethiopia you were essentially given a number and referrals came in that order. In Lesotho, only a few dossiers (from each country that they work with- Canada, Sweden, US, and The Netherlands) are on the table at each meeting and the government workers will look at each file and find a family for the children that are ready to be adopted. So this means we can be matched at any of these meetings at any time! <br />
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I'm not expecting to be matched for at least a year though. I tell myself this because I am a realistic person but who knows what will happen! The next meeting is sometime in June but these dates can also change. We'll see if I remain calm in June…<br />
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<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-21954744183089667192014-05-12T14:50:00.000-07:002014-05-12T14:50:38.518-07:00party of five or six?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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(crazy kids celebrating our signed off home study arriving in the mail!)<br />
<br />
all my life I have been attracted to big families. I always wanted to spend time at the houses where it was loud and busy and messy and full of love. Those were the families that always seemed to have their priorities set as well. They weren't the one's necessarily going to disneyland every summer or putting their kids in tons of lessons. They were just somehow the houses filled with chaos and yet also peace. <br />
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I dream of a future where our kids come home for dinners and the table is FULL. I know that some of our kids might even move far away so I figure the more kids you have the better chance at getting the full holiday dinner table!<br />
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When we were first married we took care of my bosses four kids for a month and got to live the insanity of coordinating driving to piano lessons, soccer games, and one kid working at a restaurant. It was pure craziness. But we both loved it. The month we spent doing this has stuck with me and whenever we tried to decide if we should adopt one or two the memory of that time would come to me.<br />
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And for this reason and many more we are applying to be on the wait list for siblings from Lesotho. For some reason I keep seeing twins…. but who knows. <br />
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We have said that we "prefer" one boy and one girl but we know that if we are shown a referral for two boys we wouldn't say no. But of course, one can dream. I would LOVE for my daughter to have a sister as I do. And I would love for my son to have a brother. <br />
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After deciding all of this (and it took quite awhile…. right until the last day of our home study) our agency has said that the likelihood is quite small that there will be siblings under the age of Holly (currently 3.5). And since we cannot change the birth order they have asked us to also be open to accepting a referral of just one. So we might even get a referral for one child but if it is one we have said that we prefer a boy. Our son is currently surrounded by female cousins and he is begging for a brother. <br />
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We are also open to a variety of medical needs.<br />
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So there it is. The who of who we are adopting. <br />
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So what do you think it will be?<br />
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<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-60270035564646360532014-05-06T16:17:00.001-07:002014-05-06T16:17:06.408-07:00Dossier is done!I am so happy to say that I finally finished our dossier. Man, things are much slower the second time around when you already have two kids. The old me was so on top of every piece of paperwork, staying up late to get things done. This time I tried and usually ended up too tired or overwhelmed or busy to finish it each night. In some ways it was good because when things didn't go as planned and some things had to be re-done again…. I had way more patience. In the end I finally sent off every last piece of paper and one massive cheque and I got the email from our agency yesterday that they have sent it to Lesotho and will let me know when it arrives safe and sound. <br />
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When it gets there that is when you could officially say we are "paper pregnant" and the real waiting begins.<br />
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It could be months, it could be a year, it could be several years. Who really knows in international adoption. <br />
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But we are ready to wait since we know just how worth the wait it all is. <br />
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<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-90792603881263822312014-04-23T10:02:00.003-07:002014-04-23T10:16:09.826-07:00A new journey!So I have decided to resurrect this blog to update whoever in the world might be reading this that we are adopting again!!!! That's right our family is expanding!!!<br />
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We are so excited to announce that after many months of research and pondering <a href="http://jenhatmaker.com/blog/2013/05/14/examining-adoption-ethics-part-one">(You must read Jen Hatmaker's series on the ethics of adoption if you haven't already)</a>and researching again we have found an amazing program in the country of Lesotho. Don't worry I had never heard of Lesotho either. It is a small landlocked country inside of South Africa! The government only works with 3 countries and Canada is one of them. Anyways, I will post more about the process later.<br />
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We actually started our home study at the very end of September and finished it up five months later. <br />
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I am in the final stages now of collecting paperwork for our dossier to then be sent over to Lesotho and be translated. Can't wait to say that we are "officially" waiting. <br />
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Here is a picture I took months ago in September when we mailed in our application to our agency Sunrise in Vancouver. I can't believe how long it has been already, it seems like ages ago Holly had stitches in her forehead! <br />
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<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-21644811771513014932013-05-03T20:50:00.001-07:002013-05-03T20:50:41.324-07:00On being shythere is nothing wrong with being shy<br />
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or attached.<br />
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In fact, research shows that the more attached a child is to their parent the better off they will be for the rest of their lives. THE REST OF THEIR LIVES PEOPLE. This is big. <br />
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I could insert a whole bunch of quotes from attachment researchers to back this up but I'm too lazy. Just go read Gordon Neufeld if you are curious.<br />
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But I will say that I am so tired lately of feeling that disapproving look when people see that my daughter won't go to them. Or that she let's us know by crying (very loudly) that she is uncomfortable in a situation.<br />
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I am glad she does this. She trusts us enough to let us know. <br />
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And if she is shy for years to come, that is great too. Because it is who she is.<br />
If you want to know her you have to work for a relationship. <br />
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But it will be worth it, trust me. <br />
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<i>Do you have a shy child? How do people treat him or her? </i><br />
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<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-47586699983797349412013-04-04T22:22:00.000-07:002013-04-04T22:22:22.609-07:00sometimes i step back and watch you<br />
and try so hard to tell my soul to remember this very moment<br />
this silly dance you do in front of the tv<br />
the way you look at me when you've snuck something out of the treat cupboard<br />
the way you raise your voice an octave when you talk to your sister<br />
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you and holly are my treasures. <br />
before you i was on a hunt for purpose<br />
and now i have it abundantly<br />
to love<br />
and love<br />
and love you up.<br />
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<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-53571687842404692382012-04-12T08:53:00.001-07:002012-04-12T08:53:05.400-07:00My response to "Your children want YOU"<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">Since when did we start hiring stylists for family birthday parties? or friends baby showers? Since when did we feel the need to post pictures of every single detail of what we did for our child's birthday party all over Facebook but not mention the real TRUTH of the party... as in how you fought with your husband earlier in the day, or the way your child actually didn't even want to eat the dinosaur shaped food you spent hours making. </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">I finished reading the article "<a href="http://powerofmoms.com/2012/04/your-children-want-you/">"Your Children Want YOU"</a> written by April Perry yesterday and it had me all fired up! For awhile now I have felt this very thing but never articulated it. I have been finding myself more and more turned off by all the "perfect people" in my life... or maybe I should clarify, "my online life"! ha. So many people now have their expensive DSLR cameras and take these amazing pictures of what looks like their perfect life. </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">At first it was exciting to sees how great of photos one can take, but now I find myself so turned off by all the perfection that I actually gravitate and LOVE my friends photos that are taken with crappy digital cameras and show random real shots of their child often out of focus! Does this make sense? It's not like there is really anything wrong with taking excellent photos, it's just that it all becomes the SAME after awhile.... every family portrait..... every shot of babe and mom....every perfect image. </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">Back to my point. The article. Okay, the author talks a lot about Pinterest and how it is fuelling this desire for perfection. And at the same time taking us away from what really matters. Although it is great to get fun ideas off of Pinterest to do with your child, the point is your child really just wants time and love from you. TIME. and perhaps a relaxed and happy mom. Not a mom that is desperately trying to do this amazing craft project, all the while photographing it for their blog.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">And I am guilty of all of this. Trust me. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">I actually "applied" for my Pinterest account and got my "invitation" only to not use it (such a joke that they make you apply, as if it is some club you may or may not get in to). It's still sitting in my inbox and I haven't yet decided what to do with it. I feel like I already spend too much time online, yet when I have browsed Pi</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">nterest I have found such fun ideas.... like teaching your child the cycle of the moon with oreo cookies. Come on, that's awesome! And I would never have thought of that on my own. What to do, what to do. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">Do I have the personal strength to view all these images and not beat myself up for not having a clean home? For not having the physical strength to get extravagant birthday parties together because I live with chronic pain? </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">We'll see.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">For now, if you are a mom and any of this rings true to you, go read the article and take a moment to remember that your children really just want you.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">I believe in what St. Irenaeus says, "The glory of God is a human being fully alive." The greatest gift we can give God is ourselves fully alive. Therefore, I believe this is also the greatest gift we can give our children.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">Let us live our lives ALIVE and WELL.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">xo</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"> </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse;"><br /></span></span>emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-60758756924847118812012-03-30T16:16:00.002-07:002012-03-30T16:16:28.886-07:00Confession FridayI confess that I am the WORST blogger ever and am serious considering taking down this blog! What is the point of this blog if I never post anything???!!!<br />
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I confess I do write posts in my heads. Lots of them actually... on all sort of fascinating subjects like homeschooling, and theology, and food, and funny things that my insane children do or say but I never get to putting them on here.<br />
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I confess that my house is turning into a dungeon there are so many lights burnt out. And my electrician husband refuses to CHANGE THEM!!!!!!! GRRRRR.... I try but I have issues and either buy the wrong one's or can't reach/install them. <br />
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I confess that we are moving in 2 weeks and I'm super excited to move but not to pack.<br />
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I confess that the cortisol levels in my body are running very high right now and I just want to RUN AWAY!!! lol. <br />
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I confess that I am seriously considering not posting this it so boring.<br />
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okay, fine i will.<br />
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<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-60886749371151828672012-01-17T13:21:00.000-08:002012-01-17T13:21:10.291-08:00this year's word.So it is a new year. 2012. I suppose I should have done this post on the 1st of January but it has taken me until the 16th to have a moment... hopefully you don't mind!<br />
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To be honest it is hard for me to see that it has been just over a year since my dear Holly was born (December 29th) and yet I am still deep in the thick of recovery or perhaps accepting this new level of back pain. Well, i'm not quite ready to accept it actually... so instead I am busy with going to all of my health practitioners in the hopes to be in less pain. <br />
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that is my goal. every single day. to be in less pain. ugh. some days it works, some days it doesn't.<br />
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If you were to flip through my pocket calendar at a glance you would see a bunch of words like "physio, chiro, massage, physio..." i have literally spent thousands of dollars on this throughout this year (we don't have a health plan but it is worth it). and honestly I feel like adding more words.... like, "naturopath, chinese doctor, counselling, gym" lol. <br />
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I don't say this to bring on pity.... i'm just reflecting on my life!!! and this is it. <br />
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This new years was an improvement.... last new years i was recovering from my c-section with horrible nerve pain in the hospital. This year I was at home with my wonderful family of four! I am thankful for this.<br />
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But in the last few months I have found myself having a hard time at all the big days. Like any sort of holiday where I can remember how i was doing the following year. I try to be thankful that I am somewhat stronger.... not on as strong of drugs.... but inside I feel depressed that I am still on drugs and that I am still in more daily pain that I was ever used to prior to having Holly. And new pain... oh the new pain : (<br />
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Some of my friends and dear family members understand chronic pain and have been such a great support and encouragement to me throughout this year. I am SO thankful for them and all of their help. I honestly don't know how I would have survived this year. I'm not sure how our marriage even survived this year!<br />
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At Holly's birthday party I truly felt like it was a day to celebrate that I had survived the year. Like I should be throwing a party for my sister and all her heroic efforts that got me through this year! I have no idea what I would do with out her. <br />
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So I hear the trend is to pick a word to summarize up your hope for the new year. I decided to pick the word "well". <b> I want to be well</b>. Not necessarily healthy (although yes I want that), but emotionally, physically, and spiritually healthy. I think the word well captures all of that. <br />
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"It is well... in my soul." <br />
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I hope that this year means more sleep, more joy, and the ability and time to start working out again. Not just physio, but actually working out. I miss that. <br />
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I hope for wellness for all of you lovely readers too.<br />
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So, if <b>you </b>were to pick a word for this year what would it be?<br />
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<br />emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-82628839628073229582012-01-15T10:02:00.001-08:002012-01-15T10:02:54.013-08:00paradise<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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thought some of you might like this!emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7459646316307201413.post-55959468821524417562011-12-01T11:02:00.000-08:002011-12-01T11:02:50.452-08:00Buechner and Oprah...spoke to me.... and have helped me slowly get over all the things that have been angering me lately. <br />
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I was watching one of Oprah's life lessons on her new OWN network (is that cheesy?) and it seriously helped me! <br />
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All she said was this and it stopped me in my tracks, "When people can't give you what you need, then move on." She went on to say that we need to stop thinking, "I wish they would do this, be this, say this..."<br />
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I spend way too much time thinking these things. So my new goal is to stop! To try and accept people for exactly who they are. I don't want to be disappointed, as I am someone who has very high expectations of the humans in my life. But I think I am just going to <b>move on</b>.<br />
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and then today I read this..... and my soul said "YES!"<br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; line-height: 18px;">“Stop trying to protect, to rescue, to judge, to manage the lives around you . . . remember that the lives of others are not your business. They are their business. They are God’s business . . . even your own life is not your business. It also is God’s business. Leave it to God. It is an astonishing thought. It can become a life-transforming thought . . . unclench the fists of your spirit and take it easy . . . What deadens us most to God’s presence within us, I think, is the inner dialogue that we are continuously engaged in with ourselves, the endless chatter of human thought. I suspect that there is nothing more crucial to true spiritual comfort . . . than being able from time to time to stop that chatter . . . ”</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; line-height: 18px;"> -Frederick Buechner</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 18px;"><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">I thought I would share this with you since so many of you shared your advice with me.... thank you for that.</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">Not sure if you are still reading.... but I think I might have a bit more "blogging" in me left....</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">And I'll leave you with a picture! I think it has been awhile since I posted one of my family.</span></span><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-lXSYfGJzwPI/TtfO4K7FjnI/AAAAAAAAAzk/VVtJu2-zmVI/s1600/EMMH_Nov2011_4x6_Hires-2571.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-lXSYfGJzwPI/TtfO4K7FjnI/AAAAAAAAAzk/VVtJu2-zmVI/s320/EMMH_Nov2011_4x6_Hires-2571.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;"><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">Happy December 1st! Happy Advent! </span>emilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04937795241602964804noreply@blogger.com8