Education Seminar -complete
Today Mike and I were at an all-day adoption seminar in Vancouver. The seminar itself was pretty general and discussed domestic and international adoption. I was hoping it would be more in-depth. I think I will plan on registering for another seminar that deals specifically with attachment or biracial families later on.
However, the BEST part of the day was listening to a variety of different families tell their stories. Both the domestic and international panel were amazing. Basically, I was crying the whole time! I can't go into their stories because of confidentiality but let's just say that I now feel much more open to the idea of open adoption and adopting older children!!!
I was blown away by the family that adopted 8 and 10 year old siblings from Russia. Their daughter who is now 17 came and spoke about life in an orphanage and how it felt coming to Canada...... I will never forget her story.
Other things I learned that maybe some of you might find interesting:
-flannel graphs do have importance and I plan to find one (or make one) for our kids
-giving time outs may not be the best option for kids with attachment issues; time ins may be a better alternative
(a time in could be suggesting your child sits on your lap for two minutes or having your child do a boring chore with you like wash the kitchen floor)
-overstimulation doesn't just come from suddenly having lots of toys and new surroundings. Since our baby will most likely have only seen the same faces day in and day out at the oprhanage and transition home, even just seeing new faces every time we go out, will be extremely exhausting for him.
-Since all of the workers at orphanages are typically female it is common for children to attach first to their dad. This is mainly because the mom may seem to be just another care-taker that will come and go.
However, the BEST part of the day was listening to a variety of different families tell their stories. Both the domestic and international panel were amazing. Basically, I was crying the whole time! I can't go into their stories because of confidentiality but let's just say that I now feel much more open to the idea of open adoption and adopting older children!!!
I was blown away by the family that adopted 8 and 10 year old siblings from Russia. Their daughter who is now 17 came and spoke about life in an orphanage and how it felt coming to Canada...... I will never forget her story.
Other things I learned that maybe some of you might find interesting:
-flannel graphs do have importance and I plan to find one (or make one) for our kids
-giving time outs may not be the best option for kids with attachment issues; time ins may be a better alternative
(a time in could be suggesting your child sits on your lap for two minutes or having your child do a boring chore with you like wash the kitchen floor)
-overstimulation doesn't just come from suddenly having lots of toys and new surroundings. Since our baby will most likely have only seen the same faces day in and day out at the oprhanage and transition home, even just seeing new faces every time we go out, will be extremely exhausting for him.
-Since all of the workers at orphanages are typically female it is common for children to attach first to their dad. This is mainly because the mom may seem to be just another care-taker that will come and go.
posted by emily at
9:11 PM
4 Comments:
Wow, interesting! I never thought about overstimulation being seeing so many different faces. And connecting with the dad first, never thought of that either!!!
Hi Emily- I saw your post on Jaclyns blog and liked your name:) I always enjoy finding new stories to follow!
Best to you on this journey.
you learned a lot wow.. :)
I want to hear about your story although it is sometimes hard to translate in Korean..(no! understand ^^;;)
Interesting stuff - thanks for the post!
Nicky
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